Reality Sucks!

So I don’t know what I did yesterday, but my leg hurts. I think I overextended it or something and have aggravated a muscle, since it’s been immobile for so long? Whatever…it hurts. I’m panicking because Dr. Google says that a blood clot can feel like muscle pain, and what with the 4-hour car ride followed by the 6-hour train ride yesterday…and other medical conditions that put me at risk…I am nervous.

Hypochondriac. *sigh*

Work today was rough. Crutching around is exhausting. Thankfully I am working short shifts this week. And thankfully tomorrow is Friday!

But work is hardly my biggest concern. While my boss has been drowning and I have a crapload of shit to work through since I’ve been gone so long, I feel less concerned about it than other things—probably because the job is short-lived. My new job starts in less than two months. I just need to finish this internship and be done.

But the new job…oh God, the new job. And school! And the end of our apartment lease! All of these things will be happening in the first few weeks of September. I don’t even know what we are going to do. I’m hoping I am bearing weight on my leg before I go back to school because I am not crutching around the city. My new job is bound to be stressful, combined with going to school full-time. And then the apartment…we have two options if we don’t put an offer in on a house before September. Actually, we have to make a choice next month. We have to let our landlady know whether we are staying or not. We have two options. 1) Sign a lease for another year and risk either wasting another $15,000+ down the drain for nothing or having to break the lease and pay a penalty. 2) Refuse another lease and either move into a new house by move-out time or move in with my parents.

Moving in with my parents is not desirable. We’d have to get a storage unit for our shit and we would have to figure out how to situate the cats. See, my parents have an old cat that has taken to pooping on the floor randomly whenever he’s really upset. To introduce our cats in that household would probably cause him to start it up again. So what do we do with the cats? Keep them in the basement room alone?? Try and keep them in the spare bedroom with us and away from my parents’ cat?

I told J yesterday, no matter what, we’re not abandoning the cats. We are not giving them to anyone, permanently or temporarily, and we aren’t putting them in a kitty kennel. Forget it. I’d rather sign another lease and break it and pay money out the ass than turn my back on my kitties.

And we still have to deal with the aftermath of the accident.

J returns to work on Sunday night. For the first time since the accident, I’ll be on my own. I’m nervous. I’m anxious. I’m not looking forward to being alone five nights out of the week again. But we don’t have a choice. We need the money. Now, more than ever.

I’m sorry, this post turned whiney. I had to write something so I could link to the other post so that you guys can read it. And this is what was on my mind. 😦

21 thoughts on “Reality Sucks!

  1. I just started following your blog…well actually I’ve been reading for awhile but have now officially signed up for the alerts.

    You’re an inspiration and I want to continue to follow up so if you’d like to share your password with me I’d love to continue reading your dream. I’ve thought about starting a blog myself to help me get through my infertility I just haven’t found my courage to do it yet. Instead I silently read everyone else’s stories. Thank you for letting me into your life!


    • I don’t know. 😦 Maybe now that you’ve accessed the protected post once, they will come up from now on? If not, try going directly to I wish the way WP set this up wasn’t so stupid. 😦

  2. I didn’t see the first post so I’m so glad you posted a link here! Hang in there hon. As if the worry and stress of a new pregnancy wasn’t enough, but having to deal with a broken leg and facing a possible move is definitely a lot. I wonder if your landlord will allow you to go month to month? My husband and I ran into the same issue when we were looking for our house. Our lease ran out 3 months before we found our house, but we just told the landord that we weren’t sure of our long term plans and requested the month to month lease. They were pretty accommodating. They did increase our rent but it wasn’t horrible. Sending you so much positivity and strength to get through it all!

  3. I can’t imagine have to be alone 5 nights a week. I’m a pretty independent person but I do not enjoy hanging out on my own at night in the apartment. Good for you for standing your ground about the kitties. I hate when ppl rehome or forget about their pets. You wouldn’t do it to a human. Your pet is family too!

    Your pw blogs don’t show up in my reader 😦

    • I love my kitties. They aren’t the same as children, but I love them to DEATH. I would never do anything bad to them. Ever. 🙂 ❤

      I'm sorry! Maybe they will now? You can try going directly to my site as well and I think it shows up then. You have the password, right??

    • Yeah, you and me both, my friend. I’m glad you can understand my position. 😦

      Leg checked, leg okay! I mean, as okay as it can be constantly being in pain. :\ Thanks for the kind words, love. Appreciate it. ❤

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