Where I am: CD24 [14dpt(rigger)]
Symptoms: same old, same old…
My hCG level came back undetectable.
I am not pregnant.
There’s a good chance that, despite my desperate attempts to be happy and not let it get me down, I’ll have a good ol’ cry in J’s arms once I get home. Then again, maybe not. But probably.
But honestly, I think I’m good. I think I’m okay. I have my eyes on the future.
Plus side for the day is I don’t have to take any more Crinone starting right very now. No more gooopy hoohah! Hopefully AF makes her appearance by the weekend, because I’d awfully like to get started on the next cycle!
And my RE (Dr. O from now own, and no that’s not a pun…his last name actually begins with O) wants to do the same protocol as last time, meaning the Clomid/Ovidrel trigger. I call on CD1, they do a baseline before CD3, and if everything looks good (which, if my ovaries know any better, they will) then back around the TTC circle we go!
My hopes for the next cycle are that I don’t end up with one incredibly large-and-in-charge follicle and a whole bunch of others that are smaller. Normal growth is what I’m aiming for this time. At least 2 or 3 good ones. That aren’t ridiculously huge.
Anyway. Work day is almost done. I had this post sitting in my drafts with “I am/am not pregnant” written there for hours. It bums me out that I had to delete the affirmative. But what can you do? Nothing but go home to the copious bottles of wine I have waiting for me…plus a sweet, loving husband exhausted from drill who just wants to snuggle and watch TV, and a nice steak dinner that we’ll be cooking together.
“There’s no harm in hoping for the best as long as you’re prepared for the worst.”
― Stephen King, Different Seasons